Monthly Archives: April 2010

Gary Numan’s Car

Vince Noir is friends with Gary Numan... I love that!

11 days to Coachella, and my mother’s mantra is… bring toilet paper

I love how in a way I’m becoming my mother.   I say this because I had this huge conversation the other night with a friend about why Gary Numan was an unintentional genius and how his patented synth slap from Cars was like some sort of bekon call to my generation, and how I also believed that it was a pre-curser to the Law and Order chung-chung.

My friend of course seemed confused, which I dismissed as idiocy, until I realized later that I kept referring to Gary Numan as Randy Newman.  This means that for the entire conversation my friend thought I was talking about the slightly bloated, raspy-voiced singer who opines that short people have no reason to live; and that in mentioning Cars he thought I was talking about the animated Disney movie.  So, this is really something of a clarification, although in my defense I knew who I was talking about. Continue reading

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My Parents on Coachella (Mom: There is no reason for you to read this post)

My mom hung this poster in my room when I was really little.

Somehow I managed to forget to tell my parents that Tubbs and I were going to Coachella.  Actually, I didn’t forget, I just avoided because I knew somehow it would get all mangled.  But it happened to come up the other day while we were at my son’s baseball game.

There’s a lot of chatting at baseball games, mostly because they take hours to complete and my mom, who was a teacher for years, enjoys critiquing the players who stink (i.e. ‘Does that boy have a learning disability?  or ‘The boy with the hat seems to lose focus, has he been tested?’).  Behind closed doors this doesn’t bother me, since I talk shit about everyone,  but when sitting amongst their parents it can make for tension, so I try to engage both my parents in conversation to keep them from veering off-track.   ‘Off-track’ can also include public neck rubbing (my mom will ask my stepdad to rub her neck)  and/or ear cleaning (my mom will jam her finger in my stepdad’s ears in a chimp like fashion) , so it’s important that I sit between them.

I should probably give you a quick visual as well.   A typical ensemble for my mom involves some sort of oversized billowy Eileen Fisher type top with waterproof sweatpants (the type with zippers on the bottom) from Marshall’s. In addition, she enjoys wearing Jesus sandals (as my sister likes to call them) with dark socks.  To top it all off, she wears cataract sun-glasses over her regular glasses. Continue reading

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